| This story was told to me by a plumber I know | | | | no more toilet bowl. In the process however, |
| and it brings home the reason why there are | | | | he managed to tear the closet flange from the |
| times to call a professional.I received a | | | | floor as well,and since it was attached to a |
| call from a homeowner asking for someone to | | | | lead closet bend, it torn and now needed |
| come estimate some repairs. When I asked the | | | | replaced too. He determined that it would be |
| sort of repairs, he said it would be too many | | | | necessary to cut out the tee in the stack |
| to enumerate, but much easier if I just came | | | | where the closet bent was attached. Since he |
| out to the house and looked. I went. It began | | | | had no idea how to repair old lead piping, he |
| like this...Old Joe wanted to change his | | | | thought using that nifty PVC from Home Depot |
| toilet seat, but couldn't get the old one | | | | would do the trick.He tried to cut the cast |
| off. So he tried wrenches until he rounded | | | | iron stack with a hacksaw to no avail, then |
| off the nuts (he was turning them the wrong | | | | tried a sawzall, also fruitless, so.... yep, |
| way because they were upside down) and then | | | | out comes the good old chisel and hammer, but |
| decided to get his trusty cold chisel and | | | | a bigger hammer this time. He whacks on the |
| hammer out. Well, he tapped a bit on it with | | | | stack a few mighty blows and Viola' it splits |
| no success, so he drew back the hammer to | | | | into several pieces with one tiny segment |
| smite a mighty blow against the stubborn | | | | still holding it all together. He pried the |
| bolt. In so doing he broke the toilet tank | | | | last vestige of solid pipe out of the wall |
| and flooded the area with cold water. This | | | | with a crowbar and suddenly the remaining |
| cold water gave him a shock and he drew back | | | | section of pipe (the vent going through the |
| in a hurry dropping the hammer into the | | | | roof) lets go and with a mighty crash comes |
| bathtub causing a big chunk of the porcelain | | | | down and out of the wall through the sub |
| to pop off the tub floor.Regrouping his | | | | floor into the now plaster less ceiling of |
| thoughts, he ran down to the basement two | | | | the living room, continues its downward |
| floors below to shut off the water to the | | | | decent until it hits the TV set, ricocheting |
| house, the house had no other valves | | | | off that and through the floor of the living |
| installed when it was built in the 1890's. | | | | room until it hit the electrical panel |
| Meanwhile water was flooding through the | | | | plunging the house into total darkness and |
| floors and had saturated the plaster of the | | | | finally comes to rest after shearing off the |
| ceiling below to the point it collapsed into | | | | main water shut off valve flooding the |
| the living room. Old Joe then removed what | | | | basement.This was a $27,000 toilet seat |
| was left of the toilet tank, and tried to | | | | replacement.For More Do It Yourself Funny |
| remove the bowl from the floor flange. It | | | | Stories visit: Forte has been in the |
| wouldn't budge either, so out comes the | | | | construction field for over 25 years. |
| trusty chisel and hammer again, and "WHACK" | | | | |